Her story, without doubt, will touch your
heart.
It is very inspiring.
Interestingly, in this interview with
TheNATION, the single mother of one opens
up her bitter-sweet experience in life...
How is it like coming from a polygamous
family, considering that many people say
awful tales about it?
In Yoruba, they say, “Ile olorogun, eta’nu ma
wa ni ibe”. But I think it has to do with
individuals. I enjoy my childhood and I am
proud of my parents. They had their own
mistakes and they made their own choices. I
also had my own mistakes and I have my
own choices to make. So, I will not come out
and say anything awful about my family
because I have my own stepsisters and
stepbrothers. If my father didn’t have them
with their mum, I probably would not have
brothers and sisters to call my own. So, I will
say it is a blessing to me. Though I am not
propagating polygamy, it is part of Africa.
When did you start leaving independently of
your parents?
When I say I was alone that time, I mean
that everybody was going about his or her
business and nobody wanted to really
understand how you were feeling
psychologically. It was just me in my world,
so one could do some naughty things
through peer group influence. I won’t advise
parents to leave their children alone. They
should try and understand how they feel,
even in their decision-making because you
might not know where you have left them
alone.
Did that also result in your dropping out of
school?
Yes. You know, you can just stray away
without looking back, if you refuse to listen
to what people are saying. My mother was
extremely strict and she shaped me with
proverbs. The proverbs were enough strokes
of the cane that will last you a lifetime. I
missed with friends who didn’t think of the
future but the present and you could just
play away your lectures, exam dates, tests
and assignments. That is it why I still
maintain that it is you as an individual.
I guess that was also the period you got
pregnant?
Yes, that was the period. I had my baby; and
like I said, you now have to start correcting
the mistake you have made. All in all, it was
a wonderful experience that I can never
trade away today. I thank God I had him
then, though early. As I said earlier, my
youth really got me prepared for what lies
ahead of me. As an individual, I already
knew what I wanted and how I wanted it, so
I would just say it is a blessing that it
happened then.
How old were you then?
I was 17.
You mum must have been very disappointed
in you, knowing that she was always
cautioning you.
She took me in, washed me, cleaned me up
and put my feet firmly on ground such that I
had to start and do it right. I would say ever
since then, our bond got tighter as mother
and child. She is a mother any human being
will ever wish for. A lot of people gave her
all sorts of advice.
Did she feel she didn’t do enough to caution
you?
She just attributed it to destiny. I am the
only child; so, if I had to be at home, I would
be locked up in the house. But as a
mischievous child, I devised a means of still
going out to play with my friends. Of course,
it wasn’t anything naughty. But a child
needs people around him or her. So, it is not
really nice when a child is alone in a
massive compound because he or she might
get naughty. And at times, you get tired of
being alone.
So, you wanted to explore?
Yes, you are right.
And then, you abused the freedom in the
process?
When the people who are supposed to shape
you are not around, you tend to miss your
ways. I guess that was what happened and I
made my mistakes in time and corrected
them in time.
Did you attempt to abort the pregnancy?
Yes, I did. But it didn’t work for me.
How?
I was asked to use some pills; but you know,
destiny is destiny. He was meant to come
and he came. He couldn’t even be aborted.
There are children out there whose parents
did everything humanly possible to
terminate them, but they still came. There
are reasons why the abortion would fail and
it is only God who knows th
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